WE FOUND OUR BOY!!

We found our boy!!!!! We had planned to come home with two boys under 5, but God had something else planned for our family, and this boy is a perfect fit in every way. He has dark hair, light eyes, and the same skin tone as the girls. He is bright, energetic, and has a happy disposition. When he walked into the room to greet us, he came up to us, shook our hands and said, “Hello, my name is D” (in Russian of course).
Several adoptive parents have told us that you will know instantly when you meet your child, and that is how we both felt. We still took some time to meet with the orphanage personnel, and the doctor, and we spent some time playing with him on the playground at the orphanage, but we knew from the instant we saw him.
He does not have any health issues that concern us, although he does have a very small umbilical hernia that they chose not to fix because it is so small. He also has a lazy eye which seems to be very common among orphans. I think this is due to a lack of visual stimulation when they are babies. He will likely need glasses, and possibly some corrective surgery, because he may be considered too old to completely correct the problem with eye patching. He was able to identify the objects in a picture book, and he was able to name each of us on the small display screen on our camera, so he seems to see fairly well.
When we went back to the apartment after our visit, we realized that we had all noticed that he was walking funny. Matt had already come to terms with the idea that he was not going to have an athlete for a son. Knowing that we were concerned, Vanya immediately called a pediatrician, and they discussed the possible causes of this, and whether or not it could be related to the lazy eye. When we returned the next day, we focused in on his walk. We first noticed that his sandals were buckled way too loosely. Then, we noticed a problem with his right sandal. We were tickled to find out that the cause of his funny walk was only a broken sandal. The next day he showed up in a new pair of sandals and has walked fine since.
He is very conversational, and seems to have an appropriate vocabulary for his age. Vanya has been quite surprised at some of the things that he has said. After we decided to adopt him, he told Vanya that his new parents spoke English, and he would speak English after he goes on the samulot (plane). If only it were that easy! When we were leaving the orphanage yesterday, Vanya overheard him talking to the guard at the door. He said, “I used to not have a family, but now I do”. Are you crying now? I’m sure he can’t begin to imagine what that really means, since he has little concept of what a family is, and he has no idea how much his life is about to change. He has spent his entire life in an orphanage, which is actually somewhat comforting to us, because from what we have seen of the orphanage, he is loved and well cared for, and we don’t have to wonder if he had some kind of tragic home life.
The social pedagog (the lady whose job it is to teach them social skills) told us that he likes Legos and soccer, so we decided to bring him Legos on the second day. He immediately opened the booklet that comes with the Legos, and started building one of the examples in the book. Today, we brought him a puzzle, and he completed it easily. The girls are crazy about him, and they are a huge help when it comes to entertaining him for 4 hours a day (visiting hours are from 10 am -12 noon and 4-6 pm each day) on a rather uninteresting playground. When we brought him the puzzle today, he said, “I want my sisters to do it with me”. We are settling in to a new schedule of two daily visits, and I’m sure that the rest of our time will be filled with meals, grocery shopping , laundry, and other daily necessities.
Vanya spent Friday, and part of Saturday running around like crazy to get paperwork completed, and tomorrow he will be leaving at 5:30 am to travel to D’s hometown to complete more paperwork. A taxi will pick us up to take us to the orphanage for our visits. This will be our first visit without a translator, but I’m sure we’ll be just fine.

A VERY GOOD DAY

We arrived in Mariupol at eight in the morning on Friday after the longest train ride of lives. Fortunately, we brought lots of food to eat and had four relatively comfortable beds to sleep on. We were ready to meet this five year old boy.

Unlike our first meeting, everything on Friday went perfectly well. First, the district social worker met with us on time. He then, unlike most people in his position, escorted us to the orphanage. When we arrived at the orphanage, he quickly walked us into the orphanage director’s office. After the director and her staff gave us a briefing about the child, we met our son for the first time.

I can tell you that the moment Tami and I saw D, we knew he was right for our family. He has a contagious smile and a charming personality. Our first two days together have been a pleasure. He even looks like a little Armstrong.

I must say, I was not expecting to have such a strong emotional reaction when he walked into the office. It was beyond words. I can think of no better way to explain this other than to say he is the answer to our prayers.

Today, we had a chance to not only visit D a second time, but offer him a small snack. Even though we have been warned about the eating habits of orphans, it is hilarious to watch him eat for the first time. His first course was a banana. He quickly unpeeled it and proceeded to devour the piece of fruit in three large gulps. While we watched each bite, I worried that he was going to choke because he shoved the banana so deeply into his mouth. Tami quickly grabbed the peel because she thought he was going to eat it also. His next course was a box of juice. He took a deep breath and drank ten ounces of juice in one continuous sip. He then tilted the juice box multiple times to see if perhaps a slightly different angle might get him more juice. We now know precisely why the directly told us in no uncertain terms not to give him too much to eat during snack time.

Thanks for checking in. We’ve been so busy that Tami hasn’t had time to blog, but you can expect to hear from her soon.

A SECOND REFERRAL

Yesterday, we received a surprise morning phone call from the SDA regarding a five year old boy who had just come available. We were presented with the option of waiting until next week when many more children will come off the registry, or going to visit this little boy now. During our afternoon meeting, we had many questions for the social worker. After she explained the story of this child, we decided to accept this referral.

We are packing up and preparing to leave Kyiv at 3:00 pm for the Azov Sea town of Mariupol. We are scheduled to arrive at 8:00 am tomorrow morning. Fortunately, we will have our own compartment with four beds. Yes, it is a long train ride so it may be a few days before we get a chance to post again. We appreciate your support and thanks for checking in.

Sunday night soccer game

Last night, we went out to dinner with Vanya. The food here is a little different, but still yummy. I had a salad that had two peach halves filled with chicken salad and cheese. We also had our favorite Ukrainian pizza which is topped with chicken, corn, and pineapple. The pizza here is small with thin crust, and sort of reminds me of the pizza from Panera. The kids always get cheese pizza, and I can tell from the waiters’ reaction, that this is quite unusual. There is always some additional dialog between our translator and the waiter and I’m assuming the waiter is saying, “Only cheese… nothing else? Are you sure? Well, that’s still going to cost you the same.”
After dinner, we went to the soccer game between two Kiev teams. Dynamo Kiev, which seems to be the most popular team here (and Kostya’s favorite), and the other team, whose name I don’t remember. Matt said it was sort of like the Lakers vs. the Clippers. It was fun, but the girls were getting bored by half time. Vanya went and got them an ice cream, which probably bought us an additional 20-30 minutes. We left before the game ended, which was probably good because we beat the crowd. When we left, Dynamo Kiev was winning 2-1, but I haven’t heard the final score. After a quick trip to the bakery and the market, we went home and went to bed.

Ear Piercing and Bowling

On Saturday, B decided that she was ready to get her ears pierced. Even though I didn’t mention it, I was a little concerned that the safety and sterilization would not be up to US standards, but I was wrong. Right after B mentioned it, Kostya started looking into salons that did piercings, and before we knew it, he had an appointment scheduled. It was a very nice salon, clean and modern. I don’t even think they did hair. I think it was just for facials, massages. etc. B was a little nervous. We were greeted by two very sweet Ukrainian women in white lab coats who helped B pick out a pair of earrings. Then one of the women took us back into a room. The room looked a bit like an operating room. It was bright, clean, and sterile. She scrubbed down like she was about to perform surgery, and began removing tools from the sealed, sterile containers. She spent quite a long time measuring and marking B’s ears, and then she let B try the gun so that she could hear what it would sound like. The next thing we knew, B had pierced ears and now she was getting a shoulder and neck massage. All that for 68 gryvna (less than $14.00) That will always be a great memory for her, and now K has decided that she wants to come back to Ukraine to get her ears pierced when she is 9.
After B got her ears pierced, we went bowling with Kostya, Vanya (one of Kostya’s assistants), and our friends from Mississippi. Matt was winning, but in the final frame, Vanya bowled three strikes to win the game (Matt said that was an unnecessary detail to add).

Another Day

Life in Kyiv is not too different from life at home. On Wednesday, we traveled to an American style mall where we ate McDonalds, ice skated, and window shopped. Yesterday, we went to a beach on the Dnepr River. The beach was similar to the Balboa fun zone. There were all kinds of fun things to do. The girls had a blast on the water slides and went on a bumper boat ride after they swam in the river.

Today was laundry day. Thankfully, our friends from Mississippi offered us their washing machine. Our new apartment does not have a washing machine and neither one of us wanted to do laundry in our apartment bathtub. So, Tami spent most of the day at their apartment doing laundry while I stayed at our apartment watching the kids. I think they broke a record for time on the internet playing at their new favorite web site called “Club Penguin”. Tonight, we walked to a park so the kids could run around a little. Before we knew it, it was 9:30 and time to head home. The playground was still full of kids and there was plenty of daylight when we left. Just another day in Kyiv. Thanks for checking in.

Yesterday, we went to St Sophia’s Cathedral, and to the top of its bell tower. The view from the bell tower was amazing. We had a bird’s-eye view of the entire city. The original structure was built in 1037 by order of Kievan Rus Grand prince Yaraslov the Wise, whose sarcophagus is in the cathedral. The cathedral is adorned with the original 11th century frescoes and mosaics, which are absolutely beautiful. Unfortunately, we were not allowed to take pictures inside.
After we went to the cathedral, we took the Funicular, then the Metro, and then a shuttle bus until we arrived at a very American style mall with an ice rink, bowling alley, and movie theater. The girls had a great time ice-skating. At their food court, Kostya and I ate at Sbarro (spelled Cbappo in Russian, but still pronounced Sbarro) and Matt and the kids had McDonalds. The mall also contained a grocery store that was bigger than any market we have at home. It was about the size of a WalMart, but it was mostly groceries. I was so overwhelmed with all of the choices that we actually left without buying anything. Earlier this morning I was regretting the fact that we didn’t buy any pastries for breakfast. The baked goods are wonderful here, and you can buy at huge loaf of bread for 3 gryvna (about 60 cents).

Ice Cream

I’m sure we have passed by Baskin Robbins at least a dozen times, but we still haven’t tried any. There is also a TGI Friday’s here, but we haven’t gone there yet either. We did go to McDonald’s once. K calls this one McDonald’s Palace, and you can see why in the picture. Yesterday, the girls declared that they like Ukrainian ice cream better than California ice cream. They’ve had plenty of opportunities to sample every kind, because Kostya buys them at least one almost every day. I think this is his way of keeping the whining to a minimum.

Lots of Walking

We have actually been to the World War II Memorial twice now, and I think Matt is hoping to go one more time. Rich, I’m sure you would love it. I’m not sure that the girls will be up for a third trip, since it is quite a long distance away. We are doing tons of walking and we are really enjoying the exercise. People here walk everywhere, and what is considered walking distance in Ukraine, is definitely not walking distance at home. I think that by the second day here, I had figured out that when Kostya says “it’s right around the corner”, that usually means about a 20-30 minute walk, and when he is in a hurry, I think he can WALK a six minute mile. The unbelievable thing is that the women do tons of walking in 5 inch stiletto heels, and most of the streets and walkways are made of uneven cobblestones – beautiful, but difficult to negotiate, even in flat shoes. I have no idea how they do it. Soon I will try to post some pictures of the fashion here. The first time we went to the WWII Memorial, we walked the entire way, and much of it was up hill. Matt estimated that we walked about 6 miles, but I’m convinced it was more than that. We walked past many of the official government buildings, including the Presidential Palace (posted here), and the Parliament building. I was amazed at how we were able to walk right up to the front of many of these buildings, without encountering a significant amount of security. Then we walked through a beautiful park, where we literally saw dozens of brides walking through the park taking pictures in front of various historical monuments. Ukraine is definitely a country filled with MANY beautiful statues and monuments.
The memorial also had some missiles left over from the cold war. Kostya pointed to one and joked that that one was pointed right at our home city. We had a little laugh about the fact that we both used to hide under our desks during bomb drills, but we are so grateful for the fact that our kids don’t have to live with that fear.

The Golden Gates

The view from our old apartment window looked right out onto the “Golden Gates”, which is an important historical sight in the city. The first picture is the view of the Golden Gates from our balcony, and the second one is taken from a different angel, and is the location of the Gate to the City prior to the 13th Century Mongol invasion.

Ukrainian National Memorial Museum

If you like war history, you would enjoy going to Ukraine’s National Memorial Museum in Kyiv. Besides the large display of Soviet weapons, they have magnificent bronze sculptures depicting the Ukrainian/Soviet citizens and soldiers who fought so valiantly during the Nazi occupation. Prior to the war, Kyiv was a city of 500,000 people. After the war, its population dwindled down to 80,000. Tens of thousands of citizens were executed.

I was most impressed by the “Motherland” statue which is comparable to our Statue of Liberty. It is over 100 meters tall and weighs over 500 tons. It was built during the 70’s and commemorated on May 9, 1981. It sits on top the river bank overlooking the Dnepr River. We are looking forward to taking a river boat cruise so we can look up at the statue.

You can see from the picture of the tank with the flowers painted on it that the Soviet Union had their own peace movement. The girls had fun climbing on top of it. I hope all is well back home. Thanks for checking in.

Back in Kyiv

Here are a few pictures from our day back in Kyiv. We have a great view, and we watched the city come alive this morning. Most of these pictures are taken from our balcony or in our aparatment.

Khmelnytsky and back to Kyiv

Matt did a great job of describing our terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day yesterday. It was a long day that was both physically and emotionally exhausting, and at the end of it, I had brief thoughts of putting the kids on a plane and sending them home. Although after another great day in Kiev today, I am over that for now. We are in another great apartment, and we had a really relaxing morning just hanging out in our apartment. We all slept until 7:30. This was the first time that I have made it past 4:30, so I was really happy. We had bread, pastries and coffee for breakfast, thanks to Kostya who went out very late last night to pick up groceries for us. The girls took a bath in our huge tub. At 2:00 we went back to the SDA to turn in paperwork, and make an official request for a second appointment. They are going to call us at the end of next week to let us know when that appointment will be. So for the next week or so, we will just be hanging out being tourists, I guess. Tonight we went to dinner with another American couple from Mississippi. They are a lot of fun, so it was nice to be able to spend some time with them. They are also working with Kostya, and they are waiting for their second appointment too. Our day in Kyiv ended with a summer thunderstorm, followed by a beautiful rainbow.

A VERY LONG DAY-Wednesday, July 11th.

Let me begin with the important matter. After a lot of wonder and anticipation, we finally met the boy around noon on Wednesday. Both our daughters were fully sold on adopting him. God bless them for having such open hearts. He was quite sweet and cute which made the decision a little more difficult for me and Tami. Unfortunately, he had unexpected health problems. Quite simply, we are not prepared to adopt a child with these types of health issues. We had to say no.

The day began around midnight when we boarded a train from Kyiv to Khmelnytsky. The sleeper car had four pull down beds where we slept most of the way which helped speed up the five and a half hour trip. Around 5:30 AM, we exited the train with lots of time to kill. Our first meeting was at nine.

If Kyiv is like New York, then Khmelnytsky is like Fresno. It is the agricultural hub of the region and does not offer much for tourists. It was nice to see this part of the country as well.

Basically, this day was all about waiting. We waited for a while at the social workers office. Then, we waited for a hours at the orphanage. Then, we waited for a couple more hours for the orphanage director to complete her post visit report. Then, we scrambled in the pouring rain from one place to another so we could complete the post visit paper work before the end of the business day.

You see, time was critical because we needed to get back to Kyiv. The SDA (State Department of Adoption) only accepts requests for second appointments on Tuesdays and Thursdays. At 4:15, we were done. So, we bolted for the train station to catch a 4:45 train. You guessed it. We missed the train. So, we ended up taking a 6:00 bus back to Kyiv which proved to be a far less desirable way to travel.

In a way, missing the train was a blessing because it gave us a chance to eat. Remember, we are spoiled Americans. We get irritable when we miss a meal or two. Fortunately, we found a pizza place near the train station where we ate our first meal of the day.

The bus was packed with people sitting and standing. Perhaps, the most interesting part of the trip was the three or four congestion problems we faced. The traffic was not bad at all compared to Orange County. Our problem was related to a large bovine creature. On several occasions, hundreds and hundreds of cows blocked the road. They were NOT crossing the road. They were walking down the road seriously impeding traffic. The driver honked and honked for about fifteen minutes each time until he was finally able to squeeze through an opening in between these darn animals. Amazingly, we all slept on the ride back despite our comfort level. We were exhausted.

We arrived in Kyiv at 10:30 and jumped in a taxi to get us to our new apartment. While we were loading the vehicle, a mentally ill man started yelling at our translator. I thought he was going to hit Kostya. To top things off, he repeatedly kept trying to get into our taxi.

We arrived at our new apartment just before midnight. It too is very nice. We all quickly crawled into bed and enjoyed a good night’s sleep. Today, we are taking it easy. We will be leaving for the SDA in a little bit to see when we can get a second referral. Thanks for your support.

The SDA Appointment-Monday, July 9th.

I was definitely nervous this morning as we were getting ready for our appointment. Kostya suggested that we all pray together before we left, and that was very comforting. We arrived at the SDA a little early, which gave me just enough time to get even more nervous. We were escorted in by the SDA English translator, Tatiana. We met with the social worker who said that they don’t have any young male sibling groups available right now, and she said that the wait could be up to one month. As Matt mentioned, we have chosen to go visit a little boy who is 2 ½ years old.
Kostya has been so incredibly supportive of us, and is constantly doing all he can to make sure our needs are met. It is almost like having our own personal concierge traveling with us. He is so patient with us and our kids, although I’m sure having them here really does add to his work load.
The girls have been keeping busy with games, and DVDs. B has been working on a story on the laptop, and I think she is on the fifth page already, and they both are keeping a journal. Both Matt and K have said that so far this trip feels like a really great vacation, and they are right. It appears that everyone is recovering from jet lag except me, as I am still waking up around 4:00, which is also about the time that the sun rises here.
Tomorrow night we will take the train to Khmelnytsky to visit this little boy.

The appointment

Our first injury




















This morning at 11:00 AM, the adoption officials presented a number of options to us. Because there were no sibling-sets available that meet are requirements, we have chosen to visit a two and half year boy in the city of Khmelnitskiy which is about four hours west of Kiev. We are planning on meeting him on Wednesday.

Attending church yesterday was a special experience. This church was planted by an American church and is now operating independently and doing quite well. I was particularly impressed with the way the men sing in church. All of the men sang and sang well unlike yours truly in our church. As a matter of fact, some of the members were wondering why Tami and I were not singing. When they realized we were Americans, they cut us some slack. The highlight for the girls was the trip to the church. We took the subway which is very deep underground. It was at least 500 feet below the street.

The first two days

This is our bathroom

This is our kitchen

The girls had fun at the park

Kostya has been so good to our girls!

Well, I agree with Matt. Kiev is really beautiful. It is very green, hilly, and full of incredible architecture. Our apartment is very close to Independence Square, the site of the Orange Revolution, and the center of the city. It is a very cosmopolitan city, full of life, and hustle and bustle. The people here are beautiful, although they are a bit more “decorated” than we are at home. From the hair color and make-up, to the stiletto heels and embroidered and rhinestone studded jeans, I admit I feel a bit plain walking down the street. Even the men wear the “fancy” jeans. Our translator, Kostya, has been wonderful. I hope I won’t offend him by saying that he looks and sounds like he could be from “Anytown”, USA. He took the girls to a playground in the beautiful park yesterday, and they had a great time there. Last night after he left our apartment, they asked, “When is Kostya coming back?” He has been so wonderful to us and to the girls, and we feel really blessed to have him with us. Our apartment is really wonderful. We tried to prepare the girls for “roughing it”, but that definitely hasn’t happened so far. It has 12 foot ceilings, a large modern bathroom, and a beautiful balcony with lush, green trees outside our window. On Sunday we went to church in a small church where the service was in Russian. It was really moving to hear all of my old favorite hymns sung in Russian, and even though we couldn’t understand a word of the sermon (well, actually, I think I recognized about five or six words), I’m so glad we went. The girls went into the children’s class (which I think was for kids of all ages), and when we picked them up, they asked if they could go back next week.
We have been to a Ukrainian cafeteria style restaurant a couple of times, and we have liked everything that we have tried so far. The food is very good, but much richer than I am used to, and it doesn’t take much to fill me up. The girls are slowly finding foods that they like too, and even though we have passed a McDonalds several times, they haven’t asked to go there yet (although I am sure that is coming soon).

A beautiful City

St. Michael's square

Independence Statue

Independence Square

St. Andrew's Church

Kreshatik Street during the weekend

Arriving in Kyiv

A few months ago, I awoke after an early morning dream about our stay in Kiev. I immediately told Tami how clean and beautiful this historical city appeared. She smiled and lost in my mind it went. Well, my dream was not far off from the truth. Kiev is a jewel of a place. Of course, we only hit the hot spots this morning while killing time for three hours, but we saw some of the most gorgeous places. We walked through a lush park that sits up on a hill where you get a spectacular view of the Dnepr River. We saw ornate cathedrals, awesome statues, and architecturally stunning buildings. Some people even say the city reminds them of Paris. I am obviously quite impressed.

After emailing our facilitator, Kostya, for a year and a half, we were excited to finally meet him in person. He speaks excellent English with a bit of a southern accent. He works with many people from the south. He found a nice one bedroom apartment for us to stay while we are in Kiev. He will be instrumental in helping us pull this whole thing off. Tomorrow, we will be attending church with him which will be very interesting since the whole service will be in Russian. Despite the language block, I am looking forward to tomorrow’s service. Thanks again for all of your prayers. We had a great day in Kiev!